Codependency Level Test - the question form
Questions: 50 · 10 minutes
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Male form
Female form
1. Do you sometimes neglect yourself and your family in order to maintain your relationship with your partner?
Yes
No
2. Do you think your relationship will fall apart if you do not keep making constant efforts?
Yes
No
3. Does your partner tell you how to dress and look?
Yes
No
4. Do you consider it possible that you might die by suicide because of your partner, your relationship, or what is happening in it?
Yes
No
5. Do you often behave in a manipulative way with your partner and then feel guilty?
Yes
No
6. Do you often put your partner’s needs and wishes above your own?
Yes
No
7. Do you often want to continue an argument after a conflict has already ended?
Yes
No
8. Do you often lose control of yourself during a conflict?
Yes
No
9. Do you often feel afraid to tell your partner that you are feeling emotional pain?
Yes
No
10. Do you often say, “Well, it’s not as bad as it could be”?
Yes
No
11. Do you feel stuck in this relationship?
Yes
No
12. Do you understand the idea of using sex to obtain closeness with your partner?
Yes
No
13. Can you be late for work because of problems in your relationship with your partner?
Yes
No
14. During an argument, do you consider it possible that you might hit your partner, or that they might hit you?
Yes
No
15. Do you often stay silent to keep the peace between you and your partner?
Yes
No
16. Do your relationships negatively affect your reputation?
Yes
No
17. Do you have to give up things you need or enjoy in order to avoid your partner's displeasure?
Yes
No
18. Do you ever pay off your partner’s debts or resolve your partner’s financial difficulties?
Yes
No
19. Are you able to recognize other people’s personal boundaries and to set and maintain boundaries in relationships?
Yes
No
20. Is the following statement true: if someone does not like something, it means they just have not really tried it yet?
Yes
No
21. During arguments, do you often bring up past hurts to "make a stronger point"?
Yes
No
22. Do you ever freeze (feel stuck) during an argument with your partner?
Yes
No
23. Do you feel you should stay in a relationship until any last hope is gone?
Yes
No
24. Would you consider borrowing money for your partner because they are in a life crisis or need treatment for an addiction?
Yes
No
25. Do you often feel ashamed of your partner?
Yes
No
26. Do you give your partner much more than you receive in return?
Yes
No
27. Is your partner's opinion more important and valuable than your own?
Yes
No
28. Do you feel nervous or uncomfortable when you are alone?
Yes
No
29. Do you ever start an argument because you feel disappointed or dissatisfied that you cannot change your partner?
Yes
No
30. Do you control your emotions most of the time?
Yes
No
31. Do you consider it possible that you would commit an illegal act to financially support your partner?
Yes
No
32. Does your partner make most decisions in your relationship?
Yes
No
33. Do you often have trouble falling asleep because of problems in your relationship?
Yes
No
34. Do you fear that your partner will find out what you really feel?
Yes
No
35. Do you get upset when your partner does not follow the plan you have made?
Yes
No
36. Do you often smile or laugh when you feel angry or upset?
Yes
No
37. Would life be much better if those close to you saw things the same way you do?
Yes
No
38. Do you want your partner to change?
Yes
No
39. Does your partner (or your relationship) have two clearly distinct phases: "good" and "bad"?
Yes
No
40. Do you feel rejected when your partner spends time with friends?
Yes
No
41. Do you feel unhappy because of your relationship?
Yes
No
42. Do you feel very uncomfortable standing up for your own interests or defending yourself?
Yes
No
43. Has your decision to stay in the relationship negatively affected your ability to work effectively, reducing your career ambitions?
Yes
No
44. Do you feel as if you consistently need more from the relationship than your partner does?
Yes
No
45. Do you often remain passive in situations that are humiliating or dangerous?
Yes
No
46. Are you not very happy in this relationship?
Yes
No
47. Is it possible for you to have sex with your partner if they want to but you do not?
Yes
No
48. Do you consider it possible that you would sell your belongings to provide financial help to your partner?
Yes
No
49. Is it difficult for you to express your feelings to your partner?
Yes
No
50. After you have won an argument or come out on top, do you often continue the conflict and find it hard to stop?
Yes
No
1. Do you sometimes neglect yourself and your family in order to maintain your relationship with your partner?
Yes
No
2. Do you think your relationship will fall apart if you do not keep putting in constant effort?
Yes
No
3. Does your partner tell you how to dress and look?
Yes
No
4. Do you think there is a possibility that you might die by suicide because of your partner, your relationship, or what is happening in it?
Yes
No
5. Do you often behave manipulatively toward your partner and then feel guilty?
Yes
No
6. Do you often put your partner's needs and wishes ahead of your own?
Yes
No
7. Do you often want to continue a conflict after an argument has already ended?
Yes
No
8. Do you often lose control of yourself during a conflict?
Yes
No
9. Do you often fear telling your partner that you feel emotionally hurt?
Yes
No
10. Do you often say, “Well, it’s not as bad as it could be”?
Yes
No
11. Do you feel stuck in this relationship?
Yes
No
12. Does the idea of using sex to gain closeness with your partner make sense to you?
Yes
No
13. Can problems in your relationship with your partner cause you to be late for work?
Yes
No
14. In an argument, do you consider it possible that you might hit your partner, or that your partner might hit you?
Yes
No
15. Do you often keep silent to maintain peace between you and your partner?
Yes
No
16. Do your relationships negatively affect your reputation?
Yes
No
17. Do you have to give up things you need or enjoy in order to avoid your partner’s disapproval?
Yes
No
18. Do you ever pay off your partner’s debts or help resolve their financial difficulties?
Yes
No
19. Do you have a good sense of other people’s personal boundaries, and are you able to set and maintain boundaries in relationships?
Yes
No
20. Is the following statement true: If someone does not like something, it just means they have not really learned to appreciate it yet?
Yes
No
21. During arguments, do you often bring up past hurts to “make a stronger point”?
Yes
No
22. Do you ever freeze up during an argument with your partner?
Yes
No
23. Do you need to stay in a relationship until there is no hope left?
Yes
No
24. Do you consider it possible that you would borrow money for your partner because they are in a life crisis or need treatment for an addiction?
Yes
No
25. How often do you feel ashamed of your partner?
Yes
No
26. Do you give your partner much more than you receive in return?
Yes
No
27. Is your partner’s opinion more important and valuable than your own?
Yes
No
28. Do you feel nervous or uncomfortable when you are alone?
Yes
No
29. Do you ever start an argument because you feel disappointed or dissatisfied that you cannot change your partner?
Yes
No
30. Do you control your emotions most of the time?
Yes
No
31. Do you consider it possible that you would commit an illegal act in order to financially support your partner?
Yes
No
32. Does your partner make most of the decisions in your relationship?
Yes
No
33. Do you often have trouble falling asleep because of problems in your relationship?
Yes
No
34. Are you afraid that your partner will find out how you really feel?
Yes
No
35. Do you feel upset when your partner does not follow the plan you have set?
Yes
No
36. Do you often smile or laugh when you feel angry or irritated?
Yes
No
37. Would life be much better if the people close to you saw things the same way you do?
Yes
No
38. Do you want your partner to change?
Yes
No
39. Does your partner (or your relationship) have two clearly distinct phases: “good” and “bad”?
Yes
No
40. Do you feel rejected when your partner spends time with friends?
Yes
No
41. Do you feel unhappy because of your relationship?
Yes
No
42. Do you feel very uncomfortable asserting your own needs or standing up for yourself?
Yes
No
43. Has your choice to stay in the relationship negatively affected your ability to work effectively and reduced your career ambition?
Yes
No
44. Do you feel as if you consistently need more from the relationship than your partner does?
Yes
No
45. Do you often remain passive in situations that are degrading or dangerous?
Yes
No
46. Are you not very happy in this relationship?
Yes
No
47. Would you have sex with your partner if they wanted to, even if you did not?
Yes
No
48. Do you consider it possible that you would sell your belongings to provide financial help to your partner?
Yes
No
49. Is it difficult for you to express your feelings to your partner?
Yes
No
50. After you have won an argument or come out on top, do you often keep the conflict going and find it hard to stop?
Yes
No