When to End a Friendship Quiz

Questions: 15 · 10 minutes
1. At a group gathering, you make a mistake or disagree with your friend. What response is most typical?
They address it privately and leave room for both perspectives.
They make a pointed joke, but acknowledge the impact when I raise it.
They repeatedly ridicule me, recruit others against me, or reveal private details to embarrass me.
They launch threats or a deliberate humiliation campaign intended to frighten or destroy my relationships.
2. What best describes sexual or intimate touching in this friendship?
There has been no unwanted intimate touching.
They initiated contact I did not welcome, recognized my response, and stopped immediately.
They have repeated intimate touching after I refused, froze, pulled away, or asked them to stop.
They have forced or coerced sexual contact, or touched me when I could not consent, even once.
3. How does this friend handle activities that could put you in physical danger?
They repeatedly push me into unsafe situations or abandon me without a reasonable way to get to safety.
They have deliberately exposed me to immediate danger or caused a physical injury.
They check my comfort and accept my decision not to participate.
They sometimes pressure me to take a risk, but back down when I firmly refuse.
4. Looking at the friendship as it currently exists, how does it affect your day-to-day emotional state?
It generally leaves room for me to feel like myself, even when we disagree.
Certain interactions drain me, but the discomfort is limited and I can name what needs to change.
I often feel tense, diminished, trapped, or responsible for managing their reactions.
I feel afraid of them or believe ending contact could trigger threats, stalking, exposure, or harm.
5. When you explain that something they did hurt you, what usually follows?
They listen, take appropriate responsibility, and make a meaningful effort to change.
They are defensive at first but return to the issue and attempt repair.
They deny the pattern, reverse the blame, or promise change without sustained follow-through.
They retaliate, threaten me, intensify the behavior, or make me fear raising concerns again.
6. What has happened with objects, doors, or weapons during conflict?
They have used or displayed a weapon or object to threaten or injure me.
They once slammed or threw something in anger, then acknowledged that it was intimidating.
They have repeatedly broken, punched, or thrown objects near me to intimidate me.
They do not use objects or physical displays to intimidate me.
7. In social settings, how well does this friend protect your sexual boundaries around other people?
They have arranged, encouraged, or allowed a forced or exploitative sexual situation involving me.
They sometimes tease or expose private attraction after being told I would rather they did not.
They respect my privacy and support my right to decide what contact or disclosure is welcome.
They repeatedly pressure me toward sexual attention, expose me to explicit conduct, or dismiss my refusal.
8. During an argument or tense moment, how free are you to leave?
They have briefly stood in my way or made leaving physically difficult, then moved.
I can leave without physical interference.
They have confined me, physically prevented me from leaving, or pursued me with force.
They have blocked an exit, grabbed me, or taken something I needed in order to leave.
9. If your friend wants romance or sexual contact that you do not want, what happens?
They accept my answer without treating friendship as a reward for changing my mind.
They seem disappointed and ask for clarification, but ultimately accept my decision.
They repeatedly bargain, guilt me, or threaten to withdraw friendship unless I agree.
They retaliate, threaten me, exploit impairment, or proceed without freely given consent.
10. Which statement best reflects physical threats in the friendship?
They have not threatened physical harm.
They have explicitly threatened, attempted, or carried out physical harm, even once.
They use implied threats, menacing gestures, or descriptions of what they could do to me.
They made an aggressive remark framed as a joke and stopped after I objected.
11. How has your friend handled sexual images, messages, or private sexual information involving you?
They have shared, threatened to share, or created intimate material without my consent.
They respect my privacy and do not pressure me to send or view sexual material.
They sent or requested something sexual without checking first, then respected my boundary.
They repeatedly pressure me for sexual material or show it to me after I have objected.
12. How balanced are favors, money, attention, or practical support in the friendship?
The balance shifts at times, but both of us can ask, decline, and renegotiate.
I sometimes give more than I want to because their disappointment is hard to manage.
They routinely expect access to my time or resources while dismissing my needs and limits.
They obtain money, labor, housing, or access through threats, deception, or severe pressure.
13. When you indicate that physical contact is unwanted, what best describes your friend's response?
They do not use unwanted physical contact, or they stop as soon as I set the boundary.
They have continued or repeated the contact after I clearly asked them to stop.
They crossed the boundary once, then stopped and took responsibility when I spoke up.
They have forced, restrained, hit, or injured me, even if it happened only once.
14. When you spend time with other people or make plans independently, how does this friend react?
They may miss me, but they respect my other relationships and choices.
They occasionally become possessive or seek reassurance, then settle without punishing me.
They repeatedly guilt me, monitor me, or try to isolate me from other people.
They threaten retaliation, self-harm, exposure, or serious consequences to control whom I see.
15. How does your friend respond when sexual jokes, remarks, or questions make you uncomfortable?
They repeat the comments, argue that I am too sensitive, or make them more personal.
They notice or accept the boundary and avoid directing unwanted sexual comments at me.
They once misread my comfort, then apologized and stopped when I spoke up.
They use sexual humiliation, threats, or explicit harassment to frighten or punish me.
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