Narcissistic Abuse Quiz

Questions: 15 · 10 minutes
1. What happens when you spend time with friends, relatives, colleagues, or other supportive people?
My outside relationships are generally treated as my choice.
They sometimes express jealousy or seek extra reassurance but do not interfere.
They repeatedly guilt me, monitor visits, create conflicts, or discourage supportive relationships.
They use threats, confinement, exploitation, or serious retaliation to cut me off from support.
2. Which statement best matches your experience of physical sexual boundaries?
I have not experienced unwanted sexual touching from this person.
They tested a touching boundary once but stopped immediately when corrected.
They repeated unwanted touching or treated my resistance as negotiable.
They forced sexual contact, restrained me, injured me, or continued when I could not consent.
3. After a disagreement about something you clearly remember, what usually happens?
Different memories can be discussed without attacking my grasp of reality.
They sometimes dismiss my account but later allow a more balanced conversation.
They repeatedly deny documented events, rewrite conversations, or insist that my perceptions cannot be trusted.
They deliberately fabricate evidence, exploit a vulnerability, or threaten consequences to make me doubt or retract what happened.
4. Which statement best describes threats of physical harm?
They have not suggested or stated that they might physically harm me or someone I care about.
Their posture or escalating anger made me worry that harm might occur, without a direct threat.
They repeatedly used intimidating gestures or descriptions of violence without directly stating they would harm me.
They directly threatened to harm or kill me, themselves, another person, a child, or an animal to frighten or control me.
5. If you have traveled in a vehicle together, how has conflict affected your physical safety?
They have not used driving or transportation to frighten or control me.
One angry maneuver or refusal to pause a conflict made me feel unsafe.
They repeatedly drove dangerously, abandoned me, or withheld transportation to control me.
They deliberately used a vehicle to trap, strike, injure, or directly threaten serious harm to me.
6. What has happened around intimate photos, messages, or recordings?
My choices about creating, keeping, or sharing intimate material have been respected.
They asked in a way that felt pressuring, but accepted my refusal without continuing.
They repeatedly pressured me to create material or demanded access to it.
They created, shared, obtained, or threatened to share intimate material without my consent.
7. How have unwanted sexual comments, jokes, or questions been handled in this relationship?
I have not experienced unwanted sexual remarks from this person.
An unwanted remark occurred, but they stopped and acknowledged it when I objected.
Unwanted remarks continued or became humiliating after I showed discomfort.
Sexual humiliation or exposure was used to threaten, punish, or exploit me.
8. When you depended on this person for essential care, food, medication, shelter, supervision, or emotional support, what best describes the situation?
My essential needs were generally met or reasonable alternatives were sought.
A need sometimes went unmet amid limited resources, stress, or unavailable care, followed by efforts to repair the situation.
Important needs repeatedly went unmet despite requests and realistic options to provide or arrange help.
Essential care was deliberately withheld to punish, exploit, or control me, or the withholding caused injury or immediate danger.
9. When you make a mistake, disagree, or fail to meet an expectation, how are you treated?
The issue can be addressed without degrading my identity or worth.
They sometimes become cutting or contemptuous but later acknowledge the impact.
They repeatedly insult, ridicule, shame, compare, or give prolonged punitive silence.
They use severe humiliation, blackmail, exploitation, or threats of harm or exposure to punish or control me.
10. How has the person treated your choices about contraception, pregnancy, testing, or sexual healthcare?
They have respected my decisions and access to sexual healthcare.
They made dismissive or pressuring comments but did not interfere with my choices.
They repeatedly tried to control contraception, testing, pregnancy decisions, or appointments.
They sabotaged contraception, forced a reproductive outcome, withheld essential sexual healthcare, or used threats to control a decision.
11. During conflict, what physical contact or use of force has occurred?
They have not used unwanted physical contact or force against me.
They made brief unwanted physical contact but stopped immediately when I objected.
They grabbed, shoved, shook, or restrained me without causing an identified injury.
They hit, kicked, choked, injured, used a weapon against, or otherwise forcibly attacked me.
12. How have objects, belongings, or the space around you been treated during anger?
Objects and belongings have not been used to frighten or control me.
They handled or damaged an object in anger once, which made me uneasy.
They repeatedly broke belongings, struck nearby surfaces, or threw objects away from me to intimidate me.
They threw or used an object or weapon at me, injured me with one, or directly threatened to do so.
13. How does the person handle access to your phone, accounts, location, money, or daily schedule?
Access and sharing are voluntary, proportionate, and open to discussion.
They have made an intrusive request, but accepted a boundary when I set it.
They repeatedly demand passwords, track me, restrict money, or require explanations for ordinary activities.
They secretly surveil, seize essential resources, impersonate, exploit, or threaten me to enforce control.
14. When you expressed that you did not want sexual contact, what best describes the other person's response?
They accepted my decision without pressure or punishment.
They showed disappointment once but stopped when I restated the boundary.
They repeatedly argued, guilted me, or kept asking after I said no.
They used force, threats, exploitation, or my inability to consent to obtain sexual contact.
15. When you tried to leave a room, home, vehicle, or conversation, what happened?
I was able to leave without physical interference.
They stood in my way briefly but moved when I clearly asked.
They repeatedly blocked exits, took my keys, or physically obstructed me.
They confined, restrained, abducted, or directly threatened me to prevent me from leaving.
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