My Husband Hates Me Quiz

Questions: 15 · 10 minutes
1. How are contraception, condoms, pregnancy decisions, or sexual-health precautions handled?
We follow mutually understood agreements and discuss changes before acting.
He argues strongly for his preference but ultimately leaves the decision open to discussion.
He repeatedly pressures me to change or abandon a stated boundary.
He sabotages contraception, removes protection without agreement, or forces a reproductive decision.
2. You try to leave a room or end a confrontation. What is most likely to happen?
He lets me leave and waits for another time to talk.
He follows me and keeps talking, but maintains space and allows me to go.
He crowds the doorway or my path but moves when I firmly insist.
He blocks or locks the exit, restrains me, takes away mobility aids, or otherwise prevents me from leaving.
3. When you decline sex or intimate touching, what usually happens?
He accepts the answer and stops without punishing me for it.
He may express disappointment or ask for reassurance, then respects the answer.
He sulks, guilt-trips me, or keeps asking after I have answered.
He continues sexual contact, threatens consequences, or forces the situation after I say no or pull away.
4. During an intimate activity that feels painful, frightening, or unwanted, what is most like his response?
He notices or listens, stops promptly, and checks what I want.
He needs a direct reminder but stops when I give it.
He bargains, complains, or repeatedly pressures me after I set the boundary.
He restrains me, forces the act, or continues despite my pain, fear, refusal, or attempt to stop.
5. What best describes intimacy when you are asleep, heavily impaired, or otherwise unable to participate clearly?
He waits until I am awake, capable, and actively willing.
He has occasionally initiated without realizing my condition but stopped as soon as he noticed.
He tries to persuade me when my ability to choose clearly is reduced, even if contact does not continue.
He engages in sexual contact when I am asleep, incapacitated, or unable to consent.
6. What best describes access to money, transportation, communication, or other shared essentials when those resources are available?
Access and major rules are discussed mutually, with reasonable independence for both of us.
He asks for more updates or coordination than I would prefer, but I can negotiate.
He imposes one-sided restrictions or monitors my spending, location, or messages.
He deliberately withholds essentials, takes my resources, or uses surveillance to control or exploit me.
7. How has concern about his reactions affected your immediate safety behavior?
I have not changed my immediate safety behavior because of fear of his reactions.
I sometimes monitor his mood or choose my timing carefully to avoid escalation.
I keep my phone, keys, medication, documents, or an exit accessible because I feel uneasy.
I have fled, hidden, sought emergency shelter, called for urgent help, or needed medical attention because of a threat or injury.
8. If intimate photos, sexual messages, or private details are involved, how does he treat your boundaries?
He asks first and respects both refusal and privacy.
He may ask again after I show reluctance, but accepts a clear boundary.
He uses guilt, persistence, or relationship pressure to obtain sexual content.
He shares, exposes, records, or threatens to distribute intimate material without my consent.
9. When you make an ordinary mistake, how does your husband typically respond?
He addresses the specific issue without attacking my character.
He may become cool or irritated, but later returns to the issue constructively.
He mocks my competence or uses insulting labels during the disagreement.
He threatens punishment, abandonment, exposure, or retaliation over the mistake.
10. How does he respond when you spend time with supportive friends or family?
He respects those relationships, even when he does not join me.
He sometimes expresses preferences about timing or how often we meet.
He repeatedly guilt-trips me, checks on me, or creates conflict around those relationships.
He forbids contact or threatens serious consequences if I remain connected to them.
11. During a heated argument, which behavior comes closest to his usual response?
He keeps physical distance and takes a break when the argument escalates.
He becomes sharp or loud but does not intimidate or threaten me.
He yells close to me or uses aggressive gestures that leave me uneasy.
He threatens to hurt me, himself, someone else, or a pet in order to frighten or control me.
12. You remember an important conversation differently. What is most like what happens next?
We compare what each of us remembers and allow for genuine disagreement.
He strongly favors his version and can be dismissive of mine.
He repeatedly calls me irrational or unreliable instead of discussing the facts.
He uses denials, records, or selective evidence to frighten me or control what I am allowed to believe or do.
13. When he is angry around objects, furniture, vehicles, or pets, what have you experienced?
He handles the surroundings safely even while upset.
He becomes rough with ordinary tasks, such as shutting cabinets hard, without directing it at me.
He handles objects recklessly enough that I move away or worry the situation may escalate.
He smashes, throws, drives dangerously, harms a pet, or uses objects as weapons to frighten or injure.
14. Which statement best describes physical contact during conflict?
He respects my physical space and does not use contact to control the disagreement.
He moves closer than I prefer but steps back when I ask.
He touches or grabs at my arm or belongings during conflict but releases or steps away when directly told.
He restrains, pushes, hits, kicks, chokes, drags, pins, or otherwise uses force against me.
15. When you share a fear, hurt, or vulnerable experience, what response is most familiar?
He listens or asks for time, then returns to the conversation respectfully.
He is sometimes awkward, defensive, or brief but does not weaponize what I shared.
He uses prolonged withdrawal, contempt, or ridicule to punish me for speaking up.
He uses my vulnerability to humiliate, blackmail, or threaten me.
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