Is My Friend a Narcissist Quiz
Questions: 15 · 10 minutes
1. How does your friend react to your close relationships with other people?
They respect those relationships even when they do not personally connect with everyone.
They make occasional jealous comments but do not try to control my contact.
They repeatedly undermine others, create loyalty tests, or pressure me to reduce contact.
They use threats, coercion, monitoring, or deliberate lies to isolate me from support.
2. During conflict, your friend says they need space. What is the usual pattern?
They state what they need and return to the issue within a reasonable agreed period.
They withdraw longer than expected but later reconnect without using silence as leverage.
They repeatedly use prolonged silence, blocking, or disappearance to pressure me into giving in.
They combine withdrawal with threats, stalking, property damage, or other intimidation.
3. When you are visibly upset, what response is most typical?
They listen, ask what I need, and respect whether I want support or space.
They try to help briefly but become distracted or redirect the topic.
They often make my distress about them, dismiss it, or withhold support to gain leverage.
They mock my vulnerability or use what I reveal to exploit or harm me.
4. How balanced are your ordinary conversations?
We both get meaningful time to speak, ask questions, and change the subject.
They sometimes dominate, but they notice or respond when I try to participate.
They often interrupt, demand attention, or lose interest when the focus shifts to me.
They deliberately silence or demean me when I try to speak about my own experience.
5. Think about favors, practical help, and emotional labor in the friendship. Which description fits best?
The exchange feels flexible but broadly mutual over time.
It has become somewhat uneven, but they respond constructively when I raise it.
They routinely expect extensive help while treating my requests as burdens.
They knowingly use my time, money, housing, work, or connections while disregarding serious harm to me.
6. In a group that includes people your friend wants to impress, how do they treat you?
Their basic warmth and respect remain consistent.
They become more performative or self-focused but still include me.
They ignore, diminish, or use me when doing so improves their status.
They publicly humiliate, betray, or discard me to gain approval or influence.
7. When a shared rule or limit inconveniences your friend, what are they most likely to do?
Follow the same rule they expect me to follow.
Argue for an exception but accept the final limit.
Regularly claim that the rule should apply to others but not to them.
Pressure me to break a rule or take an unsafe or illegal risk for their benefit.
8. When you already have commitments that do not include your friend, how do they respond?
They respect my schedule and do not treat other commitments as disloyalty.
They sometimes make a pointed comment but do not continue pressuring me.
They regularly expect me to cancel plans or prove they come first.
They retaliate, threaten the friendship, or interfere with my other commitments.
9. How does your friend treat your belongings, money, or accounts?
They ask permission, respect my answer, and return what they borrow.
They have occasionally assumed access, but apologized and changed when corrected.
They repeatedly take, borrow, or expect resources despite my objections.
They have stolen, coerced access, or deliberately exploited me financially.
10. You decline a plan that your friend strongly wants. What typically happens next?
They accept my answer and discuss another option without pressure.
They ask me to reconsider once, then stop when I remain firm.
They keep pushing, sulk, or use guilt to wear me down.
They threaten consequences, punish me, or disregard my refusal.
11. You calmly tell your friend that something they did hurt you. What happens most often?
They listen, acknowledge the impact, and work with me on a repair.
They initially become defensive but later reflect and address the issue.
They deny responsibility, blame me, or insist that my reaction is the real problem.
They intimidate me, threaten retaliation, or punish me for speaking up.
12. What happens to personal information you ask your friend to keep private?
They keep it private and check before sharing anything sensitive.
They once shared more than I wanted, then took responsibility and respected the limit.
They repeatedly disclose private details despite reminders.
They expose or threaten to expose sensitive information to control, punish, or humiliate me.
13. After your friend apologizes for a recurring problem, what usually follows?
The apology is specific, and their behavior changes in a sustained way.
The apology is vague, but I can see a meaningful effort to improve.
The same conduct continues, or the apology turns into an explanation of why I caused it.
They retaliate or coerce me after I ask for change, even if they first apologized.
14. You and your friend remember an important conversation differently. How do they handle it?
They allow for different memories and examine available details with me.
They strongly defend their version but can consider evidence or uncertainty.
They repeatedly insist I imagined events or am too sensitive instead of discussing specifics.
They knowingly alter evidence, coordinate lies, or use my uncertainty to frighten or control me.
15. You share an achievement that matters to you. How does your friend tend to respond?
They show interest and let me enjoy the moment without making it a competition.
They acknowledge it briefly, then redirect the conversation to themselves.
They regularly minimize it, compete with it, or suggest I did not earn it.
They deliberately humiliate me or sabotage the achievement to regain attention.