Is My Dad a Narcissist Quiz
Questions: 15 · 10 minutes
1. After you clearly state a personal boundary, which pattern most closely fits your dad's response?
He makes a genuine effort to remember and respect it.
He sometimes forgets or questions it but adjusts when reminded.
He repeatedly argues that I have no right to that boundary or keeps testing it.
He retaliates, threatens me, or forcibly crosses the boundary because I stated it.
2. How often are you made responsible for managing your dad's mood or preventing his outbursts?
I am not assigned responsibility for regulating his emotions.
This has happened occasionally, but it is not a continuing expectation.
I regularly change my behavior to avoid blame, rage, withdrawal, or family disruption.
I have been threatened, forced, or hurt because I did not manage his mood as demanded.
3. How does your dad respond when your goals or achievements do not enhance the image he wants for himself or the family?
He supports choices that fit me, even when they are not what he would choose.
He sometimes seeks credit or expresses disappointment but still allows the choice to be mine.
He repeatedly pressures me to choose what makes him look successful or important.
He sabotages opportunities or punishes me for pursuing a path that does not serve his image.
4. How does your dad respond to friends, partners, relatives, or other people who support your independence?
He can raise specific concerns without trying to control the relationship.
He is sometimes possessive or critical but remains open to discussion.
He routinely disparages them, competes with them, or pressures me to reduce contact.
He blocks contact, impersonates me, confines me, or threatens someone to isolate me, even once.
5. At a gathering, your dad tells a story about you that feels embarrassing. What response best matches his behavior when you object?
He stops and checks whether I am okay with the story being shared.
He initially treats it as harmless but apologizes once he understands.
He keeps repeating the story despite knowing I want him to stop.
He escalates the humiliation or threatens retaliation because I objected.
6. After you tell your dad that something hurt your feelings, what is most likely to happen?
He listens and acknowledges the effect, even if he remembers events differently.
He is defensive at first but may listen after some time.
He often calls me too sensitive, denies my experience, or shifts the blame to me.
He humiliates me, exposes private information, or recruits others to punish me for speaking up.
7. Imagine that your dad asks for something and you give a respectful no. What usually follows?
He accepts the answer or negotiates without attacking my character.
He shows disappointment but does not keep pressuring me.
He repeatedly uses guilt, silent treatment, or accusations until I give in.
He threatens housing, money, safety, relationships, or physical consequences to force agreement.
8. When your dad clearly makes a mistake that affects you, what kind of apology or repair is most common?
He names what he did, acknowledges the effect, and tries to change the behavior.
His apology is incomplete, but he later makes some effort to repair things.
He regularly gives conditional apologies, blames me, or expects instant forgiveness.
He punishes, threatens, or harms me for expecting accountability.
9. Allowing for reasonable age-related supervision and genuine safety needs, how does your dad treat your privacy?
He asks before accessing my room, belongings, messages, or accounts.
He occasionally oversteps but accepts correction and changes his behavior.
He repeatedly searches, reads, or checks private things without a clear safety reason.
He uses surveillance, confiscation, or private information to isolate, coerce, or threaten me.
10. What is the most serious physical or intimidation-related behavior your dad has directed at you during conflict?
He has not used intimidation, property aggression, physical force, or threats against me.
He has used an intimidating posture or blocked conversation once, without trapping or threatening me.
He has repeatedly blocked exits, invaded my space, or struck or thrown objects to frighten me.
Even once, he has threatened serious harm, confined me, used a weapon, used physical force, or caused injury.
11. During a disagreement, how does your dad handle differing memories of what happened?
He accepts that we may remember things differently and considers available facts.
He strongly defends his version but can sometimes revisit it later.
He repeatedly rewrites events, denies clear statements, or insists I cannot trust my own perception.
He uses threats, confinement, physical force, or injury to make me accept his version.
12. What best describes how your dad's warmth or affection changes when you disagree with him?
Disagreement does not determine whether he treats me with care.
He may become cooler for a while, but the connection returns without demands.
He repeatedly withdraws warmth until I give in or reassure him.
He deliberately threatens abandonment or withholds essential care as punishment, even once.
13. Following an argument in which he said something hurtful, what tends to happen next?
He returns to the issue, acknowledges the harm, and works toward repair.
He resumes normal contact without much discussion, but the behavior is not a regular pattern.
He expects everyone to act as if nothing happened while the same behavior keeps recurring.
He demands silence through intimidation, threats, destruction, or physical aggression.
14. When you share an achievement or disappointment, how does your dad typically respond?
He shows interest in my experience, even when his own feelings differ.
He sometimes redirects the conversation to himself but can refocus when prompted.
He regularly minimizes my experience or makes it mainly about himself.
He mocks what I share, punishes my openness, or later uses it to hurt or threaten me.
15. When you make a major choice about education, work, clothing, beliefs, or relationships, what role does your dad take?
He offers his view while recognizing that the choice is mine where appropriate.
He pushes his preference at first but eventually allows room for my decision.
He repeatedly treats independent choices as betrayal or disloyalty.
He uses threats, forced compliance, or deliberate deprivation to dictate the choice.