Is My Relationship Healthy Quiz

1. There is mild jealousy that sometimes affects what I feel comfortable doing.

2. My partner tries to isolate me from friends, family, coworkers, or support systems.

3. When we disagree, we tend to go quiet or withdraw rather than talk it through.

4. I sometimes feel uncertain about where I stand because of mixed signals.

5. I can spend time with friends/family or alone without my partner acting controlling.

6. We communicate openly about needs and expectations.

7. My boundaries (time, privacy, body, friendships) are respected.

8. My partner controls or restricts money, work, transportation, or access to necessities.

9. When I say “no” or “not now,” it often turns into a negotiation or pressure.

10. Important conversations get postponed repeatedly instead of being addressed.

11. I feel supported in my goals, interests, or personal growth.

12. When one of us is upset, we can usually calm things down and repair the situation.

13. Plans change at the last minute because one of us is inconsistent or noncommittal.

14. I feel respected, even when we disagree.

15. My partner pressures me to share passwords or prove where I am to “earn trust.”

16. Household tasks, planning, or emotional labor feel somewhat imbalanced between us.

17. After conflict, we move on without repairing or checking in, and tension lingers.

18. My partner uses threats (to leave, expose secrets, harm themselves, take the kids/pets, or ruin me) to get their way.

19. One of us sometimes gets defensive quickly, making it hard to give feedback.

20. I sometimes hold back my true feelings to keep the peace.

21. My partner sabotages my goals (work, school, health) or punishes me for pursuing them.

22. My partner pressures me into sexual activity when I don’t want to (through guilt, persistence, or anger).

23. My partner has destroyed, thrown, or damaged property during anger (e.g., punching walls, breaking objects).

24. We occasionally avoid topics (money, sex, future plans) because they lead to tension.

25. We sometimes make decisions that affect both of us without fully consulting the other.

26. Apologies in our relationship are sometimes partial (e.g., “I’m sorry you feel that way”).

27. We occasionally check up on each other more than feels necessary (texts, whereabouts).

28. I feel afraid of my partner’s reactions (anger, punishment, retaliation) if I say “no” or disagree.

29. My partner twists events or denies things they said/did in a way that makes me doubt my memory or judgment.

30. My partner uses silent treatment, withdrawal, or affection as a weapon to control me.

31. My partner encourages solutions during conflict instead of trying to “win.”

32. My partner repeatedly dismisses my feelings as “too sensitive,” “crazy,” or “overreacting.”

33. I feel emotionally safe being myself in this relationship.

34. We sometimes bring up breaking up or leaving during arguments (even if we don’t mean it).

35. Conflicts usually get resolved rather than ignored or left to build up.

36. My partner monitors my phone, messages, social media, or location in ways that feel invasive.

37. I can say “no” without fear of punishment, guilt, or retaliation.

38. My partner makes me feel guilty or selfish for having needs, boundaries, or personal time.

39. We make important decisions in a way that feels fair to both of us.

40. I feel comfortable sharing my feelings without being mocked or shamed.

41. My partner demands constant reassurance or checks on me repeatedly when I’m not with them.

42. We often leave messages unanswered for long periods without explaining why.

43. My partner tries to control who I spend time with or where I go.

44. My partner follows through on promises and commitments most of the time.

45. My partner humiliates me, insults me, or calls me names during conflict.

46. Social time, hobbies, or friendships sometimes get deprioritized because of the relationship.

47. Small criticisms or jokes sometimes leave me feeling subtly put down.

48. We both take responsibility and apologize when we’re wrong.

49. My partner or I occasionally minimize the other person’s feelings instead of validating them.

50. We have the same argument repeatedly without reaching a clear resolution.

51. My partner ignores or pushes past my boundaries even after I have stated them clearly.

52. There are occasional trust “gray areas” (e.g., hiding small things to avoid conflict).

53. I trust my partner to be honest with me.

54. My partner has used physical force against me (pushing, grabbing, restraining, hitting) or “play fights” that hurt.

55. A disagreement sometimes turns into keeping score about past mistakes.

56. We can talk about difficult topics without it turning into insults or contempt.

57. One of us uses guilt or “after all I’ve done” comments to influence the other.

58. There is a healthy balance between giving and receiving in our relationship.

59. I sometimes feel like I’m walking on eggshells to avoid upsetting my partner.

60. After an argument, we can reconnect and treat each other kindly again.

61. If I bring up a concern, my partner takes it seriously rather than dismissing it.

62. My partner listens to me and tries to understand my perspective.

63. Boundaries (time, privacy, personal space) are occasionally pushed or tested.

64. My partner frequently accuses me of flirting, cheating, or being unfaithful without good reason.

65. We sometimes rely on mind-reading instead of clearly asking for what we need.

66. When my partner apologizes, the same harmful behavior keeps happening without real change.